


Focus

by IWannaBeAWriter



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TV 2012), Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Michelangelo (TMNT)-centric, Protective Donatello (TMNT), Protective Leonardo (TMNT), Protective Raphael, Sad, april is a sister no cap, big sister April, depressed, upset
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-23
Updated: 2019-11-17
Packaged: 2020-12-28 20:28:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,279
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21142730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IWannaBeAWriter/pseuds/IWannaBeAWriter
Summary: Mikey is a lot of things, childish, a cat-lover, and an all-around party dude. None of that matters to him, he wants to be like his brothers, he wants focus.





	1. Focus

How did they do it? Without the steady rise and fall of their chests, Mikey would assume they were dead. The three were quiet, focused, calm. Everything Mikey wasn’t.

Wiggling in place to shrug off the cramps forming in his knees, itching his arm, ragged breathing from sitting in place for too long. Splinter's sensitive ears twitched at all the movement his youngest was making. Sighing already pulled out of his trance, with no way to get back in with his son in the room.

“Hamjie!” Splinter yanked his other sons back to reality, choosing to ignore the huff of relief that came from Michelangelo. “That’s all for today, my sons.”

Raph smirked, cracking his joints. “How long were we meditating Sensei?” Next to Mikey, Raph was the worst in meditation. His thoughts got all jumbled and he was quick to get frustrated at unsuccessful attempts, if he could manage to get past that roadblock, it was an activity he enjoyed. (Raph would never come out and say that though, in fear of turning into a Jr. Splinter like Leo).

Mikey did _not _enjoy it. He just could never sit still! He tried! He really did! Why couldn’t he be like his brothers? Everything ninja came so naturally for them, and the only thing he had going for him was that he was fast. Mikey was more of a dodge/bait kinda guy. The only real use he had for his brothers’ team. Raph was the powerhouse who could take down an enemy, Leo was the fearless leader that kept them on track, and Donnie was a boy genius.

“About an hour Raphael.” Splinter answered, collecting himself and watching as his sons did the same, just less graceful, grumbling and whinnying.

“Only an hour Sensei? We usually go for three.” Ah Donnie, ever so observant.

“Maybe it was because of shell for brains over here.” Raph teased, elbowing Mikey harshly in the side. “I couldn’t focus on the first ten minutes because of his constant squirming.” Mikey flinched away from the contact. Sometimes he wondered if Raph realized how strong he was.

Splinter didn’t make any kind of reaction, knowing that an incoming agreement would follow. If he broke up all their fights, they would never learn to deal with their confrontation by themselves.

“Hey!” Mikey resorted but didn’t deny his cruel remark. Instead of taking it to heart, he brushed it off. You can’t take Raph’s bullying to seriously, it’s kind of a given. “Don’t be jealous!”

Raph scoffed, raising an eyebrow, which looked more like a crinkle in his mask. Raph raised himself to his full height. The second oldest wasn’t very tall, but he still had a few inches on the youngest, who started backing up, knowing his next sentence was going to result in a physical fight.

“Why my beauty of course! It’s to bad you got the short end of the stick” Mikey stuck his tongue out, preparing for an outlast. Raph stepped up, puffing his chest out.

The elder growled, attempting to poking Mikey in the chest, who in return smacked it away. Raph, not wanting the youngest to have the last word, tackled the smaller to the ground.

Splinter sighed, couldn’t his sons control themselves, for five minutes?

Raph had Mikey pinned down, his hands above his head, taunting his brother as he tried to escape, crying out for Leo and Donnie to help him. Donnie watched with interest, stiffing a laugh.

“Okay, Raph.” Leo finally spoke up, after silently watching their regular splat go down. “That’s enough, let him go.”

Ignoring the leader's command, he continued to poke fun. “Who’s better than you in every way?”

“You are!” Mikey squealed, playing along, pretending that he couldn’t do a counter to escape his brother's grasp. Fifteen years of merciless training doesn’t just go away.

“Raph” Leo warned, using his _leader tone, _at least that’s what the others called it, much to the distaste of Leo. It goes along perfectly with his serious face, which scrunches up and his looks like he got bit by a raccoon whenever he got frustrated. “Let him go.”

Raph turned around, still holding down his kicking hostage. “Or what fearless?”

Donnie watched as three of the Homto boys wrestled on the sweaty dojo floor that was soaked from the training they had earlier that morning.

“HAMAJI!” Splinter shouted, rubbing the brink of his nose, a headache coming on. Every turtle froze in place and straighten up with the utmost respect towards their father. “Practice is over!”

Bowing, they made their way towards the main room, playfully shoving and elbowing each other. Traveling out to relax their sore muscles and maybe grab some food. “Wait, Michelangelo, please stay.”

Raph chuckled, “Little Joker in trouble?” He quipped as he stalked out, Leo glaring at Raph for teasing Mikey, no doubt Raph would get a mouthful of a classic Leo lecture. Mikey burned with shame, staying after never meant good things.

Bowing, he got back down to his knees and waited for his Father's first move. “Michelangelo, I expect so much more from you.”

What?

Splinter eyes softened, he had a special spot in his heart reserved for him and only wanted the best for, and from him. 

“Sensei?”

Splinter internally sighed, he hated forcing his sons to do anything, he can’t always be there for them so they must learn somehow.

“Everyday, before practice you will meet me in the dojo for an extra hour of training.”

Mikey’s eyes widened, extra training for never an activity he was fond of, but this, plus regular training, and Leo has taken up his own team bonding training, it’s too much! “B-“

Splinter, who was making his own towards his bedroom slammed his cane down. “But nothing Michelangelo! You have been unfocused and slacking in these last few days, you are falling behind your brothers, no expectations!”

Lowering his head in respect, he refused to let his father see the hurt in his eyes. Not that he could from his angle, he never even turned around to scold him. “Yes, Sensei.”

_Falling Behind?_

Mikey didn’t feel like he always falling behind. He actually felt his training was going well, great even! (Expect mediation of course) But Sensei never lied, ever. He was an honorable, respectable, and a skilled master of the ninja arts. He wouldn’t lie.

_Why can’t he be more like his brothers?_

The remaining brothers were enjoying the spare time playing Mario Kart on the Tv. In a junk run, Donnie had found a Wii nestled in with some trash and managed to get it working again. With the ever-rising updates in systems like PS4, Xbox 1, the switch, it's not hard to believe that the Wii doesn’t have any real value anymore.

Repairing and fixing up some remotes, there were three of them at some time. Raph and Mikey got ahold of it though, and in a rage of failure when Mikey crossed the finished line, he threw it against the room. Then there were two.

Leo was racing as Mario, Raph chooses Bower every time, ‘because he looks badass.’ Mikey says that it's because of his terrible temper, that claim caused Raph to smack Mikey upside the head.

“Leo stop cheating!” Raph snapped, his eyes narrowing, undivided attention to the screen. Donnie watched in silence, holding himself not to splat out facts on why sitting to close to the screen causes serious health issues towards too future. If he went on a rant now, it would turn Raph’s competitive wrath into, well, angry wrath, and a fight is to be avoided.

“I’m not cheating, you just suck.” Leo taunted, forgetting his regular uptight attitude to tease his younger brother.

“I do not!” Raph resorted, “See! You are cheating!”

Donnie spoke up, watching as Mario passed Bower yet again to get back to first place. “Cheating? Are you referring to the shortcut?”

“Yeah! Cheating!”

Mario dodged the poorly aimed green shell that came from behind and passed the finish line, Raph flying in from behind.

“Damnit, Leo!” Raph snapped, throwing his controller, which Donnie quickly caught. Huffing, Raph really could be a danger zone sometimes.

“Careful Raphael, don’t want Sensei to hear you.” Leo snickered. Raph got caught swearing onetime, he was hurting for weeks. Impressionable younger brother and all.

“Whatever Leo.” Raph grumbled, “Look, you couldn’t beat Mikey’s high score either.”

The game started displaying the scores, and Mikey’s has been on the top for at least a year. Nobody could beat it, not even Mikey himself, the perfect run.

“Mikey’s like a god when it comes to this game.” Donnie snorted, he wasn’t any good at playing Mario Kart, so butting heads with Mikey was just embarrassing.

“Mikey, a god? That’s a scary thought.” Raph waved his three-fingered hands dramatically.

“Can’t imagine it, the world would erupt in the chaos of cats and video games,” Donnie said, pushing Leo away and taking his seat to play the next game.

“Speaking of the squirt, where is he?” Raph asked, glancing around, the dojo opened, implying their talk was over.

“Eh doesn’t know, don’t care.” Raph shrugged, choosing his character.

Leo gave an off-handed glare, looking around, not noticing the fleeing form to the bedrooms when his head was turned. “Don’t say that you were being extra cruel to Mike today.”

Raph, barley listening to his brother as his game had started, “Yeah yeah whatever, he was being extra annoying today.”

A gross pit settled in Leo’s stomach, but he tried his best to brush it off. It was rare that he wasn’t fighting with Raph after practice. Working out and sparring got him all riled up, Mikey was fine. He was fine.


	2. Extra Training

Mornings belonged to Mikey. It was a fact everyone around the lair respected and didn’t dare go against, not even Raph. When Mikey was younger and too little to cook or work in the kitchen, that chore went to Leo as he was the oldest.

_That was a nightmare_

Leo could not cook, his food was uneatable. When he blew up the toaster trying to make something as simple as toast, Splinter drew the line. Leo was a master ninja, a leader, and an inspiring brother, but he was no chief.

Then it was Raph’s job, but it went about the same. All he made was eggs, breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Eggs for every meal of the day, his defense? It's great in protein. His time in the kitchen only lasted two days.

Donnie was next, but food never actually left the kitchen. He woke up late and was never really _awake _until he had at least a half an hour with his coffee.

Splinter had to take it upon himself, as none of his sons would produce any food. It's not that he’s a bad cook, just a strict one. It was kind of like dieting. All the food was obnoxiously healthy, there was never enough food to leave them full. Four teenage boys? Stuck eating healthy_? _This would not do.

So when Mikey was finally old enough, hesitantly, Leo let Mikey try his chance, with supervision of course. After making sure he wouldn’t burn his hands off on the stove, Leo let him have full creative control.

Mikey didn’t want to cook anymore. He wants to train. He wants to be better, and that won't be possible with his constant goofing off, his brothers could take care o themselves for a few days.

_“Speaking of the squirt, where is he?”_

_“Don’t know, don’t care.”_

In the limited minutes, he was with Master, Raph and Leo were getting along! And when Leo won, all Raph did was throw a controller! Raph always hit him when he won. Even Donnie was joining in! They didn’t need him, they liked it better when he was gone.

A rumble came from his mid-section, he skipped dinner last night, but he didn’t have enough time to make breakfast without being late to his private training.

Leo, the typical early riser, chilling at the bar, siping what Mikey could assume was his morning green tea. “Hey, Mikey.” He greeted, not looking up from his book. He was a ninja, sight came second to sound.

“What’s up, dude.” Trying to sound as enthusiastic as possible, usually, he’s jumping and bouncy, so why does he feel so tired?

“Just reading” Leo responded, taking another sip from his steaming glass. Mikey sighed, taking a seat next to his brother to loosen up a bit before he went to the dojo. “What’s for breakfast?”

Mikey froze mid seat, his rear an inch away from touching the stool before pushing it away and straightening up.

“Figure it out” Stalking out, a frown on his face, leaving a gaping Leo behind. Did he just say that? To Leo? The brother he respects the most. Maybe he could have-. No, he would be late if he tried to help Leo, now he can only pray that he would blow anything up again.

“Ah Michelangelo, glad to see you on time.” Splinter was practicing with twin blades when Mikey came in. On-time? Did he expect him to be late? A twinge of hurt went and passed through Mike as he greeted his master.

“What’s up Se-“ The rat raised an eyebrow at his son. Mikey coughed, a sheepish grin plastered on, “I mean- Hello Sensei.”

Satisfied, the Rat nodded. “Start warming up, we will be sparring.” Mikey's heart pumped, sparring? Against Sensei _with _his brothers was unbeatable, without it would be a slaughter.

Doing laps, pushups, and leg stretches he tried to ignore the worry in his hungry stomach. Sensei knows what he's doing, Mike needs to trust him.

The one on one went about how Mike expected, bruises, cuts from Sensei’s long claws, and embarrassment racking up Mikey’s whole body.

It. Was. A. Bloodbath.

“Michelangelo faster!” Sensei drilled, slashing right above Mikey’s head that he narrowly dodged. “Faster!”

A smash to his knee sent the turtle to the ground, and a final wack on his head to knock him sideways. Splinter sighed, he was distracted, something was bugging Michelangelo’s spirt.

Sitting and rubbing his head from the new bruise that he would need to ice later. “Sensei,” Mikey mumbled, shame ridding up his body from such a humiliating defeat. “Do you think I’ll ever be as good as the others?”

Yoshi held his tongue, where could such a seemly innocent question come from? Did this lesson bring his self-steam down even more? He wanted to crouch down and embrace his child for making him seem so little. Kneeling, he put a hand on Mikey’s shoulder.

“My son, the potential and power you are capable of is limitless.” Splinter comforted. “Leonardo relies too much on being perfect and doing everything correctly, which hinders him useless when he stuck in a tight situation.” Mikey has yet to see that situation.

"Raphael's anger is a danger to everyone when uncontrolled, that's why he has his own private training." Raph has private training too? “He uses his brute strength too much and doesn’t think things through.”

A chuckle escaped Yoshi, “And Donatello thinks too much, which can be just as dangerous.” Splinter watched as Mikey glanced up at him, sadness still present.

“And you Michelangelo, your fast on your feet, quick, nimble, flexible, but like your brothers, your weakness can be a hinder.” Fast, was that all he was good for? Mikey bets that Donnie can beat him in a footrace if he tried. “But you're unfocused, that is your weakness.”

Splinter made Leo leader with his brothers in mind, Raph is too quick to punch, Donnie looks at things from one angle, and Mikey…better left unsaid. Mikey _listens _to Leo in a way he doesn’t with the others. Leo can control all that raw energy. At least, that's what Splinter hopes.

But Leo, Donnie, and Raph all balance each other out, they are a use to the overall team. Leo was a leader, Donnie was smart and could solve any problem, and Raph was an undying force of nature (Being mutant turtles they all kinda were) Mikey was just... _fast. _

He couldn’t be ungrateful, Sensei was trying to cheer him up, and he wasn’t very expressive with emotions. “Thanks, Sensei, c-can, can we continue training tomorrow?”

Splinter smiled, glad his son was taking his practice more seriously, unknowing of the more, darker, reasons behind Mikey’s training. He wants to be better, more like his brothers.

Soon, the other turtles joined them in the dojo. “Mikey? You’re here early.” Donnie commented as they strut in, lining up for Splinter to explain the day's lesson. Did everyone expect him to be late? Seriously?

“Yeah, I um, had extra training.”

Raph snickered, “Finally, I was wondering when Sensei was gonna start cracking down on you.”

Mikey glared at his brother, wanting to point out the fact he has extra training as well but kept his mouth shut.

Practice was horrifying for everyone. Mikey was hurting beyond belief from his beating beforehand. Without Mikey to send him to bed, Donnie was sleepwalking through the backflips. Raph, instead of focusing on his backrolls, took up laughing at the others. Leo tried to get them all back on track but was unsuccessful.

“HAMJI” Splinter sighed, yet another day of failed training, what is going on with his sons? Catching Raph mid tackle of Donnie who made a slid remark while the other two turtles tried to pull them off.

“Raph your such a brute!”

“At least I’m not a nerd!”

“Guys stop! Master Splinter is t-“

“OW! Raph stop! That hurts! I don’t need any more bruises!”

“HAMJI”

The four struggling boys froze, Mikey caught in a headlock by Raph while Leo tried to pull them off each other while Donnie was trapped in Mikey’s grasp.

Leo bowed his head, letting go. “Sorry Sensei.”

Raph mumbled “Teacher's pet” Under his breath, while Splinter sat against the tree.

“You four will start meditation again, clearly you cannot handle basic warmups.”

Mikey pretended to groan, but his body was dying for some kind of rest, and this would have to do.


	3. Someone like Me

The three hamato were beginning to become annoyed. Well, at least Raph was. Donnie and Leo were more set on being concerned for their younger brother. He wasn’t acting like himself, the way he snapped at Leo this morning put him off.

Right after morning training, Mikey prompted to go straight to his room, which was unusual. He likes to serve lunch, but he avoided, just like at breakfast.

“What’s up with the squirt,” Raph grunted, resting his head in his palm on the bar table, his stomach yelling angerly at him.

Donnie eyed the bedrooms, watching as Mikey slammed his shut, locking himself from the outside world. Mikey LOVED cooking, what was his problem? He seemed okay in practice. Donnie watched fuming Raph, he better do something, or he might attempt to make eggs. Donnie refuses to go through that again.

Leo stepped in, taking Donnie’s right side. “No idea, but clearly something is wrong.” Leo narrowed his sights at his immediate younger brother who waved his hands dramatically in surrender.

“It wasn’t me!” Raph huffed, “Why do you guys always point at me!”

Leo rubbed his templed, whatever. He wasn’t in the mood to fight with Raph right now. Mikey’s never acted this way, and to anyone outside their close-knit family might perceive them as ‘overreacting’. But that’s his job, to overreact, kinda comes naturally to being the oldest.

“Okay, maybe he’s just tired, he had two sessions today.” Leo reasoned, mostly to ensure himself rather then the others.

“Let’s just make lunch,” Donnie said, leaving his chair and opening the fridge, there had to be something they could make without losing fingers.

“Don’t let Raph near the stove,” Leo uttered, preparing his green tea packets.

“I heard that.” Raph hissed helping Donnie pull out stuff for sandwiches.

Mikey’s body was hurting. And that was an understatement. Sensei didn’t hold back, then, of course, he was paired with Leo, who went just as hard.

Slamming his door closed, entering his room, frowning at the mess it was. Empty pizza boxes, action figures, and other _junk _littered his room. It made him feel… Weak.

He doesn’t want weak.

He won't be weak.

Stop being weak.

Grabbing trashbags, that at some time he just absolutely_ needed. _At least they were helpful now.

Mumbling angerly as he stubbed one of his only toes on a stray toy.

Weak

Ripping posters from the walls, folding up and placing the Chris Bradford standup in the corner of the messy room, (He’ll burn it later). All this trash, childish toys, everything needed to go.

Raph has his action figures and Comics! So how should Mikey having it be any different?

No, it was different. Raph was better then him, he deserved such objects, while Mikey told himself he needed to earn them.

“Mikey?” Leo knocked at his door, holding a turkey sandwich on a paper plate. They hated dishes, and only reserved for using them at Dinner with Master Splinter.

No answer.

Leo sighed, Mikey must be really upset. “Hey Mike, I've made lunch, come get your sandwich.”

Again, no answer. Leo was expecting some kind of wisecrack that Mikey had an endless supply of, like _“Is that edible?” _or _“I’ll only eat it if Raph tries it first.”_

This was testing his patience, which was limited when it came to his brother anyway. “Mikey open this door, open it or I’ll open it for you,” Leo warned his tone even.

It swung open, a blank look on Mikey’s face, taking the food and slamming it shut once again, leaving behind a bewildered Leo. What just happened?

His room was clean! Like, not Mikey clean, but actually clean. Something was very wrong.

“Mikey, come out,” Leo demanded, this has gone on long enough, he’s putting an end to this. Without much resistance this time, Mikey appeared right away, the plate forgotten on the dresser.

Mikey looked, sad. Not the blank stare that Leo got before, he couldn’t tell if that was better, or worse. “What’s going on Mikey?”

He shook his head, angry tears peering at his mask.

Yep, something was undoubtedly wrong. Mikey was never good at controlling his emotions, but sadness was never one that came often, and here he was, about to break down in front of his leader.

“Mikey, please talk to me,” Leo begged, softly grabbing his shoulder and leading him to the bed.

The turtle sniffed, “I-“

“Hey! You said it would o-“ Raph froze, taking in the scene, confused on what exactly was going on.

Mikey’s face went scarlet and broke free of Leo’s grasp, shoving past Raph at the door while Leo cried behind him. “Raph stop him!”

Raph came close, narrowly missing the edge of his shell. The demands and howls for him to stop met on deaf ears.

They wouldn’t catch him, just like Splinter said, he was fast. He didn’t know where he was going, just as long as it wasn’t here. He was crying like a baby! That was bad enough in front of Leo, but Raph! Big strong tough guy! He could never live that down!

Raph must think less of him now, how could he not?

Weak

So Weak

The air was suffocating, dense and heavy like a stack of bricks on his shoulders. He needed out, he needed now right now.

Climbing up a ladder to the surface, the polluted air, bright lights, and hustle and bustle of humans was a refreshing change.

Mikey scaled up the Hotel building that was was closest to the man-hole. No doubt in his mind told him that his brothers are on their way. He’s already in trouble for leaving the lair. Which is a big no-no under Leo’s rule. 1) Don’t EVER go alone 2) Tell him before you leave 3) Don’t go more then two blocks away unless they go as a group. He’s already broken 2 out of 3, more trouble is the worst thing he can do.

Soft sobbing caught Mikey’s attention, looking down into a nearby alleyway, a girl, who couldn’t be any older then him, had her head buried in her knees.

Her clothes were worn-and-torn, and a cardboard box for a flatscreen at her side. A pang of hurt shot in Mikey’s heart, she was homeless.

Against his better judgment, he silently slumped down the fire escape, making sure he avoided the street nights so she couldn’t see him.

“A-Are you okay?”

The girl’s head shot up, looking around in frantic. “P-Please! I d-don’t have an-anything left!” She sobbed.

Mikey put his hands up in surrender, which was thoughtful even if she couldn’t see him. “No! I’m not gonna rob you! I was just making sure you were okay!”

The girl didn’t say anything, deep in thought. A car went by, the lights revealing Mikey to the world. She only saw him for a split second, but that was enough. Mikey started to prepare himself for her to start screaming for help.

To his surprise, she started laughing. It was ugly and filled with sadness. “Haha! Y-You're a lizard!”

What? “You're not scared of me?”

“N-No!” She laughed, taking another sip of her drink.

Hesitantly, Mikey got off the fire escape and joined her on the ground, taking a seat. She smelled funny, probably because she was homeless. “What's wrong?”

Huh, he kinda felt like Leo. “My parents.” She hiccuped. “T-“ She broke down again, unable to stop herself.

Mikey knew this was a sore subject, and whatever happened at home must have been rough enough to make her leave home, just like him. Maybe there was a lesson somewhere in this?

Mikey would never run away from home. Where would he go? She had humans that could help her, he couldn’t. His family are outsiders that were feared by the outside world. So why wasn’t she scared of him?

Quickly, he steered the conversation. “What’s your name?”

She laughed again, she was awfully giggly. “It’s E-Emily, what about you lizard.”

Mikey snickered, “It’s Mikey, and I’m not a Lizard, I’m a turtle.”

She gasped dramatically like she had committed some kind of crime by confusing a lizard by a turtle. “I- I AM SO SORRY!” Emily hiccuped, throwing the bottle that exploded on the contrate and began hitting herself in the head with his fist.

Mikey quickly shushed her, in fear of drawing any kind of attention to the ally where he might be seen. “It's okay!” He pleaded, embracing his hands in hers to prevent any more damage.

She sniffed, “You promise?” Emily asked, pulling away to yank at her hair.

Mikey smiled, “I promise.”

“Mikey!”

“Come here!”

“Michaelangelo! You come here right now!”

“You're in so much trouble!”

Ouch, they are yelling, which is so not smart. If someone looked straight up and saw three mutant turtles jumping buildings, that would not end well for anyone. They must be really angry.

Mikey looked at Emily with hope, “Hey, I gotta go, are you gonna be alright?”

Emily looked like she was about to cry again, “D-Do you promise to come back?”

Mikey rubbed the back on his head, could he keep a promise like that? He feels like he’s made enough ‘promises’ tonight. But how could he say no? Emily reminded him so much of what he’s going through, and at least he has a home and family he can go back to, she needs him.

Reaching out one of his three fingers, he shook her hand. “I promise.”

Emily waved goodbye as he left to find his brothers. Which was greeted with a punch to the side, a smack to the head, and a grounding from Leo.

“Where have you been!” Donnie hissed.

Mikey avoided eye contact. “Just.. needed some fresh air.”

Leo sighed, “Michaelangelo, were gonna talk about what happened later.” Mikey looked down in shame. “Together, we're brothers, we help each other.”

Weak

Raph pat Leo on the shell. “Let’s go fearless, it's late, we can talk tomorrow morning.”

The group trailed back home, but not before Mikey could peek down at Emily again. Her head back in her knees, shivering from the cold.

He would be back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Emily's not a huge part of this story, just kind of a wakeup call to Mikey, she's not going to be paired with anyone if that's what you're thinking. If your enjoying the story, or want to add some notes to improve my writing, please do take that time so I can get better!


	4. New friend

Mikey was feeling the heat. Last night was kind of a disaster. Although Leo said they would chat in the morning, that didn’t stop him from whisper-yelling all the way home. Raph refused to let him walk three-steps ahead of them, and Donnie kept shooting him these annoying glances.

When they did finally get back, Splinter gave his own kind of punishment, an extra twenty flips for not following Leo’s rules. Mikey preferred the more vocal discipline rather then the physical

Once his family did finally give him a break, he hopped in the shower, and went straight to bed, robbing himself of yet another meal.

The trash bags and Bradford cutout laid out across his floor, neglected to be taken out yet. It made Mikey sick.

Morning finally did come, awoken early by Leo who told him if he didn’t eat breakfast this morning he would add more flips onto Splinter’s punishment.

Fighting through his lightheadedness, Mikey swears he’s never gotten up so fast before. Taking a second to steady himself and the room to stop spinning, probably from the meals he had skipped out on.

Sometimes when Donnie was going on a nerd rant he mentioned something about Breakfast being the most important meal of the day, or was it lunch? Dinner? Whatever it didn’t matter, just as long as Leo didn’t feel the need to torture him anymore then he already was.

Figuring that he could make himself useful somehow, he lugged two of the many bags of junk to toss out.

“Hey, Kiddo-“ Raph yawned, rubbing his eyes, his mask not yet on. Leo must have woken him up as well. Has he ever been up before nine without Splinter’s threat of bodily harm? “What are you doing?”

Mikey shrugged a shoulder in confusion, before realizing he was referring to the bags. He really is slow. “Oh, just tossing some junk out.”

Raph huffed in suspicion but walked off towards the kitchen. Wow, thanks, Raph. Continuing his task, he rolled out to the giant dumpster that Donnie kept nearby for excess tech and computer stuff he no longer needed.

Clasping his hands, ridding himself of his childish bonds, and joined his brothers. Leo was sipping his morning tea and chatting with a half-wake Donnie. The second youngest was in mid-stretch, and his ‘World’s Number One Nerd’ cup on his lips. A gift from Raph and Mikey respectively was mostly supposed to be a prank but Donnie took it happily, his new favorite coffee mug.

Guess Leo awoke the whole house. “Hello, Mikey.” Leo greeted, grossly happy this early in the morning. Wasn’t Mikey a morning person at some point? Eh, it was getting harder and harder to remember details like that.

Mikey nodded and used his leftover hot water that he had previsly used for his tea to make oatmeal. He wasn’t feeling all that hungry. Leo and Donnie traded concerned looks while Raph didn’t bother beating around the bush.

“What’s wrong with you?” Raph snapped, glaring at the back of Mikey’s shell. First the old shoulder, then running off (Which was more his thing anyway) The trash bags? Now, this?

Mikey has always taken every opportunity to consume some kind of sugar-packed, calorie stacked food. Like pancakes with extra whipped cream and sprinkles, or waffles soaked in syrup with strawberries. Oatmeal was more Leo’s thing. Twice, they were kinda counting on him to make food.

Freezing in place at the sudden question which had struck a nerve, the boiling water spilled over and dumped on his hand, the metal tin hitting the ground with a cling. The brother’s reacted immediately.

Leo got an ice-pack from icecream-kitty, Donnie took Mikey's hand and held it still under running water, despite the struggles and hisses of pain. Raph stood on standby for anything Donnie needed, which his call was quickly required.

“Raph! Go and get my first-aid kit, there will be pain reliever cream and banda-“

“N-no!” Mikey pleaded, pulling his hand away and held it to his chest. “I’m fine!” Mikey tried to fight through the burn reaching up to his forearm, he wanted to be tough like Raph! Raph wouldn’t need to be babied by something as small as a little burn.

Leo held his shell and make sure he sat down, ignoring his pleas. “No, you're not fine.” Leo demanded, “Donnie look at his hand, Raph pick up the kettle and go get the first-aid.”

Nodding, Raph left to get the supplies without fighting Leo’s commands. While Donnie pried Mikey’s hand away from his plastron.

“Bu-But…” Mikey murmured. He didn’t want to be weak anymore, and now he’s stumbling over his words like a child.

“But nothing Michelaglo,” Donnie said, digging into the kit that Raph had hurriedly set down.

“Your so clumsy Mike,” Raph muttered, looking at the scene going on. Just like yesterday during Mikey’s breakdown, he’s once again useless to help him.

Leo shot a warning glare to shut up, which Raph snarred at. Raph used to be the one Mikey went to when he was scared, had a nightmare, or when he was hurt. His tough love defined their brotherly bond.

Now he has Leo, Raph can't help him, he doesn’t even know what the hell’s wrong with him, does Leo know? Why doesn't Mikey talk to him anymore?

Mikey whined as Donnie put a cream on his sensitive red skin. “Well this is a solid 2d degree burn, but it will heal on it's own as long as he doesn’t touch it.” The leader nodded in understand while Mikey sat there dumbfounded, why were they talking about him like he wasn’t there!

Donnie carefully started wrapping it, cautious not to justle it too much. “Its also gonna blister over, it's crucial that it gets time to heal.”

“By that you mean?...” Raph questioned.

Donnie sighed, finishing up and patting Mikey on the head, not noting the frown on his little brothers' face. “I recommend that he does no combat training as he can't make a fist, so no weapons, or front flips.”

Mikey moaned this was a huge setback, basically a step backward. If he can't train, then how can he keep up with the others? It's like the whole world wanted him to forever be behind. A failure.

“So your flips and mediation for you.” Leo shrugged pitifully. He knows that he hates mediation, and he had spied in on Splinter’s extra training, poor guy. At least he might learn to control himself and understand the importance of patience.

Mikey felt his body fill with anger. This was all Raph’s fault! If he didn’t detract him he would still be able to train!

“What is going on here?” Splinter asked, slight worry in his tone as he spotted his three oldest huddling around the chair.

“Mikey burnt his hand,” Leo spoke, wanting Mikey to explain in further detail himself, he had been awful quiet.

“Raph made me drop the kettle!” Mikey blamed, the pent up anger fueling into this one situation. He cant train, can’t keep up with his brothers, can't do anything right. Something as simple as boiling water could hold him back! If it was Raph, Donnie would let him practice!

Raph clenched his fists, “Me! What did I do!” Splinter watched thoughtfully. Mikey gets in a deal of trouble consistently, from pranks to skateboarding in places he shouldn’t, but never once has he pinned blame on another.

“You distracted me!” Mikey calmed, throwing his arms up to prove a point.

Leo stepped in, adding his two cents in as the leader. “Mikey, Raph did not make you do anything, you dropping the pot was of your own accord.” Using his lessons learned from Splinter to express his view.

“Michelangelo, did Raphael hold his sai to you?”

“Well no b-“

“Did Rapheal pour the water?”

“No Sensei-“

“Then he made you do nothing.”

Anger and frustration were present in Mikey, and he wasn’t ready to let his go, but bowed his head in respect anyway, eager for this conversation to be over. “Yes Sensei, you are right.”

Nodding in approval, “Today’s practice is canceled, enjoy the day off.”

Mikey held his hand, watching as Splinter walked off.

Turning to his brother he growled before stomping off before they could pt any word in. “It is your fault, Raphael.”

Raph was ready to run over and teach him a lesson with a few well-aimed punches but was stopped by Leo’s arm. “Were gonna figure this out, but the direct approach is not the way to go.”

Donnie sighed, packing his supplies. “Well, what do we do?”

Leo put his arm down, “I have an idea, but it will have to wait till tonight.”

Mikey felt like it had been years sitting around in his room waiting for nightfall. With no practice. No video games, nor comics, he had nothing to entertain himself. Talking to any of his brothers was out of the question, so he couldn’t even leave his room.

Leo must be mad at him for yelling and lashing out at them, so their probably no patrol. What if Leo came to get him and he wasn’t there? Leo would be pissed if he caught him sneaking out. Does it matter though? He promised Emily that he would come back, and he intends to keep it.

What Leo doesn’t know won't hurt him.

Obtaining the upmost silence, he creaked open his bedroom door and peeked out to make sure none of his family was lurking around. The cost clear, the rebellious teenager made his way to the exit but faced his next challenge, the livingroom.

All three of his brothers were watching some old horror movie that April must have dropped off. Leo was watching blankly, a bored stare present on his face, tolerating the cheesy film for the sake of the other two.

Donnie was pretending not to be scared as he had the blanket wrapped up in his tight fists, sitting close to Raph and Leo. Said brother was smirking, trying not to laugh at the shaking younger one.

Mikey snarled, wow, guess once again they were fairing just fine without him.

Using the training that he’s been taught for the last fifteen years of his life, he managed to sneak by his brothers who were occupied with the Tv. Lightly, he flipped over the turnstiles at the entrance, sending one last look at his brothers, who hadn’t moved nor heard a thing. See? He doesn’t always screw things up! He’s just as good a ninja as them.

Once he knew he was out of range, he took off running, excited to meet with Emily again, even if she is a little…Off. That’s okay! People said things about him all the time!

Going the same path as yesterday, he took a moment to scan the area, his gut was telling him something was wrong. Emily! Maybe she’s hurt! Rushing up the manhole he went to the same ally as before.

Emily was about how he expected, slouching the same way, but this time, freaking out and throwing around any random items she could get her hands on.

“IT’S NOT FAIR!” She cried, flinging her backpack away. “IT’S NOT FAIR!” Throwing a punch to her forehead.

Mikey quickly made his way down and got to her side, he didn’t fail to notice her hyperventilating. That's what Donnie said it was right? When people couldn't catch their breath? “Hey! Emily, it's okay!” He assured, grabbing her wrists, multitasking not to farther his injury.

Her crying never ceased but just by having someone by her side seemed to ease a bit of her tension. “It’s not fair Mikey.”

Once he was certain she wouldn’t pull her hair or punch things, he doubtfully let her hands go. “What’s not fair?” He didn’t want to upset her more, but she was hurting and needed to express herself. It didn’t seem like anyone else was around to listen.

“Life.” She sniffed, rubbing the trail of snot away with her torn hoodie. “I hate life.”

Mikey gaped at her, horrified at the thought of anyone hating life? How could you? Raph sometimes said he hates things, did Raph he hate life too? How does Mike even reply to something like that?

“Why?” His voice barely above a whisper, scared of what the answer could be.

Emily raised her hands again but Mikey quickly stopped her. “I ha-hate life. I hate it, I hate it.”

Mikey didn’t know what to do, Donnie would know. This was a mental breakdown or a panic attack? Or maybe an anxiety attack? Are they all the same thing with just fancy terms? Mikey wishes he paid attention to his brother more often.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” Mikey asked, attempting to provide help any way he could. Even though she was freaking out, she was still way more grounded then yesterday, less…floaty.

“Man.” She laughed shallowly, taking a good look at Mikey like she’s never seen him before. “You're real.”

Mikey, now on high alert, scanned the ally to make sure this wasn’t some kind of trap or trick. “Well yeah? You saw me yesterday, and I promised I would be back.” He said once he made sure nobody would jump out at him.

She scoffed like he had said something dumb. “I thought you were some messed up figure of my imagination. I wasted last night.” Emily said, throwing her head back.

Mikey tilted his head, now fully confused. He’s heard Casey use slang like that before not never fully understood it. Every time he asked, his brother laughed at him.

“You know, like drunk?” Emily said, stifling her amusement at the way he asked for a silent elaboration.

Mikey gasped, so that’s what she was drinking before! She couldn’t be any older then him! “B-but your underage!” None of his brothers were old enough to drink, and Splinter often told them it was dishonorable to the clan to let themselves fall that low.

Raphael really got it handed to him when he decided to test out the waters of drinking with Casey. Leo found him stumbling in the lair after a late night. Raph never touched a bottle again after the Leader was through with him, nor did Casey. Leo threatened Casey with bodily harm, refusing to have anyone in his family commit such dishonor. Also agreeing to not report to Splinter as long as they both stayed clean.

“Yep” Emily replied, “Makes things easier.” God, what she wouldn’t do for a drink right now. If she wasn’t still sobering up, she would be screaming her pretty little head off. Sitting in an ally with a freak of nature wasn’t how she wasn’t to spend her Wednesday.

“Like what?” Ah, back on the topic of life. Such a shame, she tried so hard to steer the conversation away from that topic.

“You know, parents, school, friends.”

Mikey was once again confused, this girl makes no sense! “Arent those all good things?”

Emily laughed again, but it was full of pain. This lizar-turtle asks a lot of questions. “No! My parents hate me, I’m failing every class, and I have no friends.”

Mikey sighed, she sounds lonely, she sounds miserable. “I’m your friend, right?” He hesitantly asked.

Emily grinned, “Yeah, I guess you are.”

Mikey's lips twisted upwards, he’s never had a human friend before! Sure there's April and Casey, but April is more Donnie’s friend then anything, and Casey had Raph. Twice, they were more family then friends.

“Why do your parents hate you?” Emily coughed, boy he was direct. The glint in his eyes told her Mikey didn’t mean anything by it and didn’t understand boundaries all that well. Maybe he’s never talked to humans before.

Emily answered his question, who would he even tell anyways? He’s kinda like a living diary who could hold her shameful secrets. “I’m a mistake, the flaw in the condom.”

Oh. “I’m s-“

“Don’t be.” Emily stopped him. “It's not your fault I’m an unplanned pregnancy, it's my parents for not being rid of me before it was too late.” Man, her head was starting to pound. It’s been too long since her last fill.

“My brothers think I’m stupid.” Woah, where did that come from? The words just kinda slipped from his lips before he could stop them.

The girl smiled, “Screwup of the family too huh? Sorry to hear that.”

Mikey rubbed the back of his neck, “Sometimes I wonder if they want me around at all.” Stop talking, stop talking! “They do just fine without me there.”

Emily looked at the ground, her stomach curling uncomfortably from the lack of food and the growing pain in her heart. “Mik-“

A bubbly tune played from Mikey’s phone, who blushed bashfully. Leo had set his ringtone and had picked the Space Heros theme song. The caller ID read Rapheal, 23 messages from Donnie, 26 from Raph, and 31 from Leo.

“Oh god, it's my brothers.” Mikey moaned, mostly talking to himself.

Emily snickered, ah family. It must be nice. Were they turtles too? “Answer it dum dum.”

Mikey shot a playful glare to his friend before answering, only to pull away at the sheer volume from the other side.

“MICHELAGO YOUR IN SO MUCH TROUBLE!”

Leo could be heard from the other side frantically asking if he was on the phone with their youngest. Fighting, a ruffle, then Leo was on the phone.

“Mikey where are you.” He wasn’t screaming like Raph, but he might as well have been. Wow, he broke his rules two nights in a row. “Donnie is tracking you right now, tell me where you are before I come to find you myself.”

Mike did not want that.

“I’m- I’m on the west manhole above.”

Quiet, Leo was seething. “You're on the surface.”

“…Yes”

“I’m coming to get you, stay where you are.”

“Wait! Leo, I’m sorry! I’ll come home!”

“No, I’m coming to you and you stay put or so help me Michelago.”

Mikey whined, pulling his phone from his ear.

Emily, an entertained smirk present, “Wow, sounds like your about to get it handed to you.”

Mikey, with all seriousness, turned to his friend. “You have no idea.”


	5. Goodbye to a Friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is it, the last chapter. It sucks to say the end but I have other stories I want to work on. I hope this isn't as rushed as it feels.

Mikey was already in a heap of trouble, Leo sounded furious over the phone. If they saw Emily, there would be hell to pay. A debt he wasn’t quite ready to fulfill. They were tracking him, and if he dared to move anywhere that would just add another thing for Leo to yell at him about.

Settling with forcing Emily into her little Tv box, under the promise that she would stay as quiet as possible and not come out. The only issue was his family were trained ninja’s, he could only hope they were upset enough that they wouldn’t notice her. As she had already refused to go anywhere, in her words this was “free entertainment.”

“Micheal!” Leo shouted, jumping down from the rafter above, followed by his other siblings. “You mind telling us where you have been!”

Full name. Not a good start.

“Yeah! What made you think it was a good idea to sneak out!” Donnie snapped, more annoyed then anything. He was caught up in a new project when Leo had demanded they went and search for Mikey when he found him missing.

“What are you even doing out here?!” Raph demanded, he didn’t even know his little brother could be quiet long enough to sneak out.

“I-“

“Whatever” Leo interrupted, yanking Mikey by his good hand. “It doesn’t matter, Splinter was the one who found you missing so your going to have to answer to him.” Splinter? Mikey felt a little sick to his stomach, this wasn’t good.

Splinter was not happy. It felt like his father was never happy or proud of him anymore. He was waiting in the lair for them and pulled Mikey aside to his room away from the others.

“Michelago, your brothers were worried about you.” Splinter started, sipping his tea and gesturing his son to do the same. It was a test, it had sugar packets in it, which Splinter hated, but wished to see if his son would drink it.

“Why Master?” They sure had a funny way of showing it, he’s not even allowed to be outside alone anymore.

“They are worried you are disconnecting from them, Donnie is upset you don’t talk to him anymore.” Splinter watched, Michelago’s cup was still untouched.

Mikey shifted, way to make him feel guilty. Donnie was always the brother he vented too. Leo often made it into some kind of lesson to be learned, and Raph just laughed at him. Donnie listened, and let him talk. “I’ve just be tired lately Sensei.”

Splinter knew this was going nowhere fast, “I made tea, just how you like it.” Two shots of pure sugar that burns his tongue, but what his son loved.

“O-Oh, I’m full.” A lie, it was so clear. He was never good a lying, even as a tot. His brothers pegged him the snitch or a mini-Leo because he could never keep a secret.

“Oh from the breakfast you didn’t eat? Or the lunch you skipped?” Splinter exposed, making Mikey cringe, he had noticed. “Why are you skipping meals, my son? Or indulging in the actives he used to enjoy?”

Mikey found himself at a crossroads, he could tell the truth, but that making so many more issues he would like to be caught in. But if he got caught lying again…He didn’t even want to think of that possibility. “The others…” Oh my god shut up! “They like this new me.”

Splinter raised a furry eyebrow. “Are you sure about that? It seems to me they miss the old you, why would you think otherwise?”

“They wanted me to grow up-, I’m doing them a favor.” Mikey chocked, when had he started crying?

“I don’t think you are my son, please, have you told them how you feel?” Splinter asked.

“I- can’t, t-they wouldn’t understand.” Mikey huffed.

“I thought you said they like this new you?” Splinter pressed, he wanted his son to see the error in his ways by himself and without Splinter telling him the answers, he would never grow that way.

“T- I me-“ Mikey felt a sob crawling up his throat, and make out any real words, but his father understood him anyway.

“Michelago, your brothers love you, they don’t want you to change, I don’t want you to change, please my son, I know this isn’t easy.”

“Fa-Father,” Mikey cried, “I’m in too deep, I can't stop.” Food made him sick to look at, and he couldn’t look at any of his brothers in the face without a swell of emotions over-flooding him.

“No, your not my son, we can help you, your family can give you the help you need.” Splinter claimed, going around the table and embracing his youngest.

“T-They will never understand.” Mikey reasoned, clenching his father's shirt. “They will laugh at me.”

Splinter smiled, glancing at the entrance of the room. “Oh my son, I don’t think they will.”

A new set of rules was given to Michealgo. He was no longer allowed to leave the lair without someone with him, and he must eat all three meals with them, even if he had to only take one bite before he was full. Eating something was better then nothing. As soon as he left Splinter's room, he was tackled and held closely by his brothers who prophecy apologized and begged for forgiveness, having no idea how truly messed up he was and not taking action sooner.

They were all just relieved they had caught Mikey's sickness before it could get worse, and it could have, of god it could have been so much worse.

Meals were taken slower, and Mikey had only managed to eat half a banana for dinner without feeling sick.

The next morning, he broke one of his newfound rules. Sneaking out was so much harder then before now that he was rarely left alone for a few minutes of the day.

He needed to see Emily, he needed to make sure she was okay. It had been about a week since he got to see her last, and wondered if she missed him as much as he did her.

She was left in the same place before, her lips blue from the cold winter weather and curled in a tight ball.

Her belongings were nowhere to be found, probably stolen by some street thugs days ago. Emily smelt strongly of decaying skin and rotten eggs.

Mikey didn’t know when he finally moved, crawling into the box with her and embracing her closely, as if it would bring her back to life.

He begged under his breath over and over again to come back, start breathing again. Rocking back and forth back and forth. Wake up. Wake up. Please god, wake up.

His tears clinging to his cheeks, freezing to his face. His body already shivering from the cold air, was this how Emily felt? Cold and alone? Wondering if anyone would ever miss her?

Leo had called a search when his brother once again left the lair, where could he be going? Something was drawing him up to the surface, he just never expected it to be a human. He found his brother curled up in a box huddling a human girl that protected them from the downpour of snow.

Donnie mentioned that if they stayed out any longer they could trigger a hibernation, and no doubt Mikey was to catch a cold. This girl he refused to let go of had severe hyperthermia and had been suffering for a few days.

Mikey was attached to the body and wouldn’t let go, and some pleading had to be done, as Donnie wanted them out of the snow as soon as possible. “We can bury her Mikey.” Leo said, “We will give her the goodbye she deserves.” And they did. Raph carried her to the battle shell while they grabbed coats.

April and Casey also tagged along and reveled they knew her as a student at their high school who often showed up with bruises and cuts from home. Child services were called but they didn’t do anything to help her, till she stopped coming altogether. It made Leo sick. The fact that parents would treat another person like that, let alone their child. Mikey had lost a friend, and Mikey lost a part of himself.

She got him, they didn’t share the same issues, but they both had them and that was enough. She didn’t run or call for help when she saw him. He was her friend.

Leo knew this was hard, and Mikey would never quite be the same again. But they would help him, and he would never feel so alone again. Donnie got him some meds that could help calm his thoughts and his eating habits. The three of them made sure he never felt unloved or weak standing next to them. He was not weak, he is stronger then them. They make sure he knows that. 


End file.
